Self-Discovery Through Journey by Eli West '23
When Whittle School & Studios announced they would not open their doors in September, I was heartbroken. I had spent months dreaming of the first day of school and had blocked all the doubts of not going back out of my mind. However, I kept the same mentality I had for the past several months - it is what it is. A friend and I were talking in late August about quarantine, and eventually, we found ourselves asking one another, "How can I make the most of it? How have I lived a purposeful life while stuck inside?" And so, I find myself in Israel, writing on my top-bunk bed, excited to share the beginning of my journey with you.
It can be scary to ask yourself what's next; many doubts start to creep in. Are people going to like me? Can I handle the challenge of being away from home for so long? Will I be accepted? I realized I could ask these questions forever, or I could take the first step. The more experiences I have, it becomes clear that life is just a series of doors; either way, I'm going to have to go through one. The difference between these doors is that I could go through kicking and screaming like a little kid, living in the past, and wishing I was at school with my friends. Or, I can step through the door with my head held high, scared, but eager and ready. I believe Whittle School & Studios has prepared me for this trip. Before 9th grade, I found myself in a similar position. Too scared to ask what was next, not having any expectations simply because I had no clue what I had signed up for. However, thanks to Whittle DC, I have learned to take comfort in the unknown and cherish it. These experiences don't come often, and it's essential to make the most of them when they come your way.
Further reflection made me think about why I chose to walk through the door that took me to Israel in the middle of a pandemic. At first, the answer was easy, wanderlust. For me, wanderlust brought me to Whittle DC, Alexander Muss High School in Israel, and hopefully Whittle Shenzhen. But was it really wanderlust? The more time I spend at AMHSI, the more I realize my original hypothesis for walking through this door and coming to Israel was wrong. At the core, it was my Judaism that brought me here.
I have always felt very connected to Judaism culturally, and that never has and will never change. I admire and love my community, family, and friends, and it is a driving force in my everyday life. The one thing that has changed for me is the need to be more in touch with my Judaism, both spiritually and religiously. After spending more time at school last year, I noticed I was one of the only Jewish students in the Upper School (if not, the only one), and realized I had taken being Jewish for granted. I took being Jewish for granted because before high school, all my school friends were Jewish (even though I didn't go to a Jewish day school), and, I had gone to a Jewish summer camp all my life. I was lucky because I never felt like an outsider regarding my religion, which is rare for so many Jews worldwide. When you only know one thing your entire life, you don't realize how important it is to you until it's gone, and that's what happened to me. I did not understand just how much I loved being Jewish until I came to Whittle. For instance, the reason I let my curly hair grow out is that it's my way of telling the world that I'm Jewish, and I love that part of me. So that’s why I'm here, living in Hod Hasharon, Israel, at AMHSI; to connect with myself, my land, my people, and my religion.
After a few months of reflecting, I have gotten a better sense of what my purpose is here. I am on a mission to accept myself for who I am. Last fall, I was afraid to tell my new friends I was Jewish. Something about it didn't feel right. This fall, I am living an unapologetically Jewish life, unafraid to talk about it with my friends, and I have never been happier in doing so.
Because of Whittle School & Studios, I have become a pioneer in every sense of the word. I refuse to be bounded by the confines of others, and instead of being fearful of the unknown, I have come to love it. None of my Jewish friends would have come here in sophomore year of high school, let alone in the middle of a pandemic. My journey is certainly not over, and I am constantly growing and changing. I am excited to continue learning more, but until then, I am happy to share my story.